One word says it all.

Merp.
Merp merp merp.
Merp is my new favorite word. It is the perfect expression, awkward silence filler and sentence enhancer.

Let me demonstrate...

Merp as an expression
Bob: I just found a five hundred dollar bill on the ground!
Bill: (sarcasm) WELL ISN'T THAT JUST FLIPPIN' MERPTASTIC.
Bob: ...merp you.

Merp as an awkward silence filler
Jack: ...
Grandpa Joe: ...
Jack: 0_____0
Grandpa Joe: .........MERP.
Jack: .___.

Merp as a sentence enhancer
George: THAT WAS THE BEST MERPING TOUCHDOWN I HAVE EVER SEEN!!!
Wendy: What the merp are you talking about, George?
George: THE GAME, WENDY! THE. MERPING. GAME.
Wendy: Well do the merping dishes for once. You can watch your merping game from the gosh merping kitchen.
George: ...
Merp that, I'm going to bed.


With the right techniques, the word merp can express anything your heart desires. Soon enough, you will be spitting out your own merp-isms faster than you can say "salsa verde."
NOW RUN FREE AND MERP YOUR LITTLE HEART OUT. MERP ON... MERP ON...