If I could have dinner with someone, who would it be and where would you go?

I would go to dinner with Jesus and Gandhi and Oprah and Nelson Mandela, Ellen, and we would all go to a classy cafe in France for a light brunch, where we will discuss life and our metaphysical perspectives on humanity and the human spirit.

What makes a good selfie?

Confidence, girl.
No matter how many filters you use, you can't mask a picture that lacks fierceness.

See?

Confidence is key. Unleash your inner Beyonce.

HASTAG NO FILTER. HASHTAG FABULOUS.

Lastly, don't be one of those people to who try to take artsy pictures of a body part. I scroll over those.

"Eye have no life."

That's it for my tips. Please take selfies responsibly. That is all.

If I could go to space, would I?

HECK NO. Have you seen Gravity??? Somewhere out there, George Clooney is still orbiting the Earth. Oh God. What if you were lost in space? No one would ever find you. You'd be floating around in oblivion for millions of years until you reach the edge of the ever-expanding universe, which means that there is no edge, so you would be floating in space until you reach a black hole where time is warped, so you'll be sucked in what seems like years but is actually minutes and then spewed out into a different dimension where aliens are a thing, or even worse, other versions of yourself, and they'll abduct you and probe you and turn you into a mindless zombie mutant slave where you'll serve the lizard king against your own will, and you'll be like, ah, no don't take me I just want to be free, I just wanted to be an individual and stand out from the crowd and say that I went to space so I'll be loved and accepted by my peers, when in fact no, you don't have to be one of the cool cats to be accepted in life, because the secret to happiness lies within yourself, but it's too late for that now, because the lizard king has you, and he's messing with your mind and telling you these things that he thinks you want to hear when in fact he's getting you to steal children and candy and do bad stuff because he wants to take over the universe and you can't do anything about it because your life is sad and you did a blog about outer space and figured out that you never will find out what happened to George Clooney and his boyish charm. Oh the horror. Oh the mutiny.

How forgiving am I when a friend lets me down?

Well.
I'd consider myself a rational person–who allows herself to let out steam through irrational action–so, you know, that requires me to be pretty forgiving. I forgive people no matter what they do, but the course of my forgiving transformation depends on the gravity of the friend's offense.

What would my American Gladiator name be?

My name would be Loser, because I would die within a five-mile ratio of that area in which American Gladiator would be held. During sophomore year, I did three-and-a-half push ups for the Fitness Gram. That's sad.

What do I think of Donald Sterling?

That guy is ridiculous. I mean, even though just by looking at him–an old, rich white guy–you can tell he's going to be racist, but the fact that he owns a basketball team (seriously, name one good white player) and that he has that kind of attitude is unbelievable. Then again, I think that his girlfriend was setting him up in the first place by recording him and getting him to say those things, but no one cares about that. Everyone should just criminalize the racist. That just proves what a sensitive topic racism is. Nobody wants to be called a racist, but they are confused when no one else agrees with their racist ideas.

What is my favorite app and why?

I like Instagram, but I can live without it. I can live without any apps. Just give me texting and calling, and I'll be okay.

Chorus to my original song commemorating my original life

I like pandas yes I do

I like almond milk and sushi too

I like reading books and poo

I guess my friends are alright too

*dubstep dance break*

I CAME IN LIKE A WRECKING BAAAAAAAAALLLLLL

 

Sue me for copyright infringement, I don't care. I do it better than Miley.

Which emoji am I?

STORY OF MY LIFE.

This defines me because I am the sass master, and I always feel the need to gesture as if I am holding an imaginary tray of quinoa.

Quinoa is so good.

If I could take one word out of the English language, what would it be?

I would take out the word "ugly".
In this wonderful, wonderful world, there is beauty in everything, and nothing and no one should ever be called ugly.
Except Crocs. Those are the ugliest things I've ever had the displeasure of beholding.

Who is the most influential person ever?

I think that no matter what you believe, you have to agree with me on this one. Jesus is undoubtedly one of the most–if not the most–influential people who has ever lived. Regardless of whether or not he was actually a godly entity, he was still a real, living person who spawned the most powerful empire that exists today, and he continues to shape millions of people's lives, influencing the masses to live within moral boundaries. He changed and still changes life during his own lifetime and after death, and everyone is glaringly aware of it. That's the difference between Jesus and, say, the person who invented language or fire or something–their influence goes unnoticed and uncredited. In contrast, Christianity is pushy about the whole Jesus situation. I'd like to see someone argue my point, because I think that I win.

What kind of scented candle would I be?

A SUPER DELICIOUS ONE, BECAUSE I SUPER LOVE SCENTED CANDLES. I would be roasted marshmallows or something. It'll smell magically delicious, and I will die of lead poisoning from eating my candle. Oh wait, I'd be eating myself. I'd die of lead poisoning and be a cannibal.

FREE WRITE: Random thoughts

Graduation is quickly approaching, and it's giving me anxiety, and anxiety-inducing events usually do. As much as I want to leave this gosh-forsaken building, I am going to miss everyone here, as well as my weekly routines.

Describe the perfect pizza

Spinach alfredo with mushrooms, olives and onions. It would be one of  those little pizza pies with a soft, thick crust and a gooey center. MMMM.

What language would I want to speak and why?

I think it'd be cool to speak something kind of obscure, like Japanese or Arabic. They just sound so cool, and their alphabetical characters just look so... foreign. As they should, I suppose.

If I could be a guest on any talk show, what would it be?

Is this even a question? I have dreamed of being on Ellen ever since her amazing talk show graced my life with insurmountable joy. I LOVE ELLEN. We can talk about how great we both are, and it'll be super awesome.
Also, I would mind being on The Talking Dead, the talk show that comes on after TWD, where they discuss TWD-related things. OK, a lot of the times, the guests and the host don't do an adequate job of analyzing episodes, and I am super awesome at picking out all of these cinematic elements and breaking them down for a deeper meaning. THEY NEVER ANSWER THE QUESTIONS THAT I HAVE.
I just need to be on TV.

What color describes my mood?

Pink all day every day. It's just such a pretty and feminine color, and I love being in a happy, blissful mood. It's just a channel for good karma, you dig. Pink is also a romantic color, but eh, I guess that counts for me, too.

Should upperclassmen have off campus lunch?

YAAAAASSSS.
I don't get why we don't have that now, especially for people who have early release.
I would have no money if we had off campus lunch.
Plano has off campus lunch. Plano is so much cooler.
Hi, I'm sick.

FREE WRITE: Save the prama for your mama

Can I be a basic white girl, because I literally just can't right now.
I'm trying not to make it a big deal, because my "problems" are minuscule in comparison to the starving children in Africa's, but it's starting to really bother me.
I've said it once, and I'll say it again: Prom destroys relationships and ruins lives.
In similar news, I finally got my dress hemmed, but the thing is, it wouldn't zip up, to which my mom turned to me and said, "You're getting fat."
Thanks, mom.
And then she told me to lose weight so that she didn't have to pay for the zipper to be replaced.
Also, I am broke. Because of prom, I have less than $150 in my account, which is dropping incrementally every month because of my stupid bank account thing.
So I am broke and fat. At least I'm not ugly.
Oh, wait.

What's one mystery you would like to be solved?

I want to know what happens after you die. I'm not going to go into it right now, because I don't feel like being all existential, but you know what's a really cool thought? What if every one becomes a star when they die? Like, a new star appears in the sky whenever someone's soul goes up into the heavens. What a pretty thought.